My Friend Allison Woolbert - Allison & Amethyst

I first met Allison Woolbert at a course we were both taking on Elements. The course was lead by two people that I have taken courses from before and had become friends with as well. Allison had graciously offered her home for this series of classes. Several of us met in Allison’s living room once a week. We were offered refreshments and had time for swapping stories and conversation after class. I guess I would call Allison’s home quaint, homey and a bit rustic. I felt very comfortable in Allison house. Besides learning the course material and loving the instructors I made two new friends Allison and Debbie.

Although I’m not very good at making new friends due in part to my crazy

work schedule (and other issues that remain from childhood experiences) Allison became a new friend. Allison and I saw each other at some  Circles  in Princeton. We tended to sit next to each other and chat. Another time we were sitting together was at a marriage ceremony at the church. Allison had been invited to participate in both the ceremony and the reception. Her outfit was lovely but I was eyeing the Amethyst Jewelry. Not only did I admired the jewelry but mentioned that I was going to an affair and looking for some purple jewelry to accessorize my outfit and Allison actually offered to let me borrow hers …even though at that point we had only know each other for a couple of months! I always think of Allison Woolbert and Amethyst together as I think of the purple stone alleviating negativity! This was even before I learned how much Allison has dedicated her time, energy, skills…her life….to alleviating so much of the negativity that others are faced with on a daily basis.

Then we became friends on Facebook and for quite a while Allison and I would instant message each other in the mornings. I would be at my desk having my breakfast and morning coffee and be chatting with Allison. Allison Woolbert and I always found something to discuss and found more and more that we are very simpatico. Then our schedules changed so our chatting was a bit more sporadic. I was just learning about the Transgender Violence Tracking project Allison created which has become an international tool for people and more recently the Leelah’s Law to be passed in the USA. This is some of Allison’s work (all volunteer) to save people from suffering, suicide and murder. If more of us could put even a tiny bit of our time into the type of work Allison Woolbert does, imagine what a better world we could have to live and thrive in!

My only regrets are missing Allison’s parties which I was invited to but did not attend (both the costume party and Birthday bash). Also that we have lived fairly close and have not gotten together more often and now Allison Woolbert is moving away. I’m sure we will remain cyber friends and will have to send you virtual hugs and kisses and wish you well form afar.

Thank you for being my friend Allison and thank you is not enough to say for how much you do to help others!!!

Linda P.

Meeting Biff- oh and Allison Woolbert

A friend of mine helped me out a while back and decided to write a small remembrance of the time we met.

Biff came into my life numerous years ago. His breed and demeanor was quiet and still, thus enabling him to assist Allison Woolbert in her adventures in new hope, pa.  She had a few days of recoup in a b&b, and frankly, really should have brought more snacks for this venture.

But Biff endured a lack of snacks, which from a dogs perspective, is a horrible offense. Biff endured.

I helped Biff get settled in Allison Woolberts room, and have kept an eye on him ever since.

He dealt with her when she set up hella tech in her house, set up a non profit, but mostly watched a lot of movies.

Pictures soon :)

Brian S.

In my memoirs on the good friends I have met, let me highlight Allison Woolbert

In my memoirs on the good friends I have met, let me highlight Allison Woolbert, I am very active in the Unitarian Universalist Church, as I have already shown. We have a national initiative in our church called "Standing on the Side of Love" and she is a frequent contributor. I was delighted to also read in one of her frequent articles that she was a transgender community activist, and it was a natural consequence that I would contact her. We began a social network friendship and because of similar interests and a similarity of slightly off center humor, we became Facebook friends. Later she would visit New Orleans and my partner and I had the please to take Ms. Woolbert on a tour, which was a great-time-had-by-all event. She self defines herself as "Allison Woolbert - Trans* Feminist, Bisexual, Polyamorous, Writer, Programmer, Advocate & More.." So I place here a partial excerpt from her bio:

"Allison Woolbert is the CEO of Phoenix Consultants Group, an expert national software development firm, founder of the Transgender Violence Tracking Portal. An educator, speaker, writer and advocate in gender bias, gender identity, gender expression, erasure, human rights equality and religious abuse, Allison brings her unique perspective and humor that draws on a rich variety and unusual breadth of experience as a gender-affirmed woman in the 21st century."

Meeting Allison Woolbert - A Wonderful Gift by Pete Knox

I first met Allison Denise Woolbert at the Unitarian Universalist Church of Southern New Jersey in 2008, only, at the time, she said, she sometimes went by the name 'Bud', my nickname for her. However, on that day, she was 'Allison.'

I had never known anyone who was transgender or wanted to transition, and, frankly, I was fascinated. One of my very best friends was gay and, I had learned a lot from her about the trials and tribulations of being a lesbian; I knew, beyond any shadow of a doubt, that homosexuality is anything BUT a “choice.” But this? I knew nothing and strove to understand.

Allison and I became fast friends: as Bud, she was an extraordinary woodworker – something I wanted to learn more about (I would give anything to have HALF of the knowledge she has in her head about woodworking!) I had the unique opportunity to follow her through her transition, both physically and mentally.

Her determination and devotion intrigued me the most; the stories of her painful youth, broke my heart and made me think, if she were my child, how would I have reacted? Allison Woolbert forced me to face what might have been uncomfortable for some people, except that her enthusiasm, as she moved forward in her transition and her sheer joy as she progressed, told me there was no better choice for her. She made it look, and seem, so natural.

I literally watched her develop from larvae, to pupae, to chrysalis and, finally, into an extraordinarily beautiful butterfly, first, through hormones, then through each and every surgery and through the process of becoming the woman that was always inside of her. And, she faced every step of the way with confidence and heroism; it was abundantly clear transitioning was exactly right.

In the end, I realized that Allison had been a true woman her entire life; that nature DOES make mistakes sometimes; that we, as human beings, were given the technology to correct those mistakes; and, when necessary, we not only should but we must.

Pete Knox

Allison Woolberts' Proposal for New DSM Classification - Social Media Dysphoria

Allisons' Proposal for the DSM: Social Media Dysphoria- created by confusing text and graphics thrown at an individual at all times by people on social media. An epidemic in the early 21st century caused by egos, psychos, activists, family members and politicians colliding in a maelstrom of spewing anything they feel like over social media with no understanding of privacy, ramifications, harms, or morality.

Remedy: Taking time away from social media that results in grounding ones-self back into reality versus false and confusing messages. Stopping the inundation by removal from the source for a given point of time to reflect and reconsider how one might benefit and not be harmed from such intense communications.

Breaking News: Smaug Seizes North Pole in Pre-Holiday Attack

In a complete surprise, Smaug of Middle-Earth has appeared and struck gold foil and gift wrap at the North Pole.  The dragon appeared totally pissed off while pulled off a scathing assault not seen since the days of Shock, Awe and Torture.  According to the conservative Faux Snews, Smaug had contacted some Rethardian House insiders to get permission to insure compliance with their EPA Smaug regulations.

Smaug reportedly was mumbling incessantly about a disagreement with Peter Jackson and Metro-Goldwyn-Mayers’ (the gold hoarding company) in their refusal to drop the part where Smaug was allegedly assassinated by some village idiot.  Occasional bouts of flame interrupted his mumbling with screams echoing across the tundra “I am not a stinking lizard Jackson!” 

Smaug was also fuming mad when he flew into the arctic area only to be confronted by some four legged creature with a blinking nose.  The creature Standing Its Ground had an assault rifle and was yelling “I ain't no stinking Hobbit”.  Second later, after the flames had gone out a pile of cooked venison began chilling in the arctic air.

Elves in shock –

Elves in panic and disarray began hastily trying to save the Book of Naughty and Nice which became dislodged and slid into the mountain of Christmas packages. In a frantic attempt to retrieve the book, several chief elves got tangled in the gold ribbons and paper resulting in a snack for Smaug as he dug his claws deeper into the castle.  The book is now lost and unfortunately under the control of Smaug.

In an attempt to negotiate with the Emperor Smaug the corporate chief elves made every attempt to dissuade Smaug from seizing the Pole by telling him how they had not defended the dwarfs when he took over his last golden hoard.   After a brief discussion, Smaug toasted the negotiators stating “Who knew- dwarves and elves all taste like chicken and where is the damn soy sauce up here!”

In terror, the elves hastily all tried to climb into the Sleigh toppling it over a cliff!  No survivors have been found as of yet.

Santa missing while Mrs. Clause is chained to the Christmas tree

Santa has gone missing and a search is underway for the chubby dude by the local authorities.  A trail of candy canes appears to lead off into the tundra.

In another surprise, Mrs. Clause apparently has been taken captive when she crossed ‘the border’ returning with the Christmas cheer (code name: Santa’s spiked eggnog) from his favorite liquor store.  Mrs. Clause stated after her brief discussion with Smaug the following “Gollum, gollum… my chubby sexy bunny is LOST!  gollum”. Interpreters are still working on the obviously coded message.

International Community Reacts

The international community has reacted very strongly by condemning the attack and closing all the chimneys in an act of defiance concerning the seized holiday gifts.   The President of the Fractured States issued the following:

“Smaug has done it this time!  We shake our fist in rage at such a terribly inconsiderate beast.  We will be issuing a proper response at some time in the future when the clock ticks on the special hour of our determination whenever that might be.”

The remainder of the international community still hasn't figured out what that means and highly suspects that heavy Haupai or Mai Tai’s were being consumed at the time of the press release.

 This has been a special pre-holiday releaese

Elf Watch- Santa Helper getting Slammed

Elf Watch- This long time Santa's Helper has hit the end of the road. the Gender Identity Wart-ch machine is now demanding the removal of all male appearing gender elfs from Santas' workshop to combat the evil elves. "All those evil bearing elves should be locked up forever and never be allowed to be near females!"

In the meantime, concerns are growing that this sleeping elf behind the wheel could result in the Family Lack-of-Credible-Research Council may be considering a constitutional amendment to ban all elves in any vehicles. "We understand the implicit dangers to our families by a psycho elf falling asleep in a vehicle- the Family Must Be Preserved and the only way to do that is a Constitutional Amendment banning elves from entering our country!"

And of course the Elfigration Department has again spoken up- "Elves infiltrating our country are of a great concern and could potentially be a terrorist- they liter endlessly with wrapped up boxes, general presence around children, and we have no idea where they go other than December! Our attempts to infiltrate their lairs have only resulted in Reindeer Poop!"

The Central Elf Lack-Of-Inteleggence Agence has also weighed in on the matter- "We have waterboarded several of these creatures lately and have established clear evidence that a full blown plot to murder Santa has been discovered. Waterboarding of elves works!"

Sadly- the state of the elf kingdom is in total disarray as the gifts are due next week, they are down the master elf now, and apparently AA is rejecting elves at the door due to a confusion as to if it's an allergy, the steps validity on elves, and the elves refusal to believe in a Higher Power greater than Santa.

Sigh- the world is a changed place- Written By Allison Woolbert (yep you can stick my name on it please)

http://www.nj.com/morris/index.ssf/2014/12/cedar_grove_man_dressed_as_elf_arrested_for_dwi.html#incart_river